I have a couple directions I want to go in this post. First things first....
Thank you to so many of you: the one who told me the Jefferson blog post resonated with him ("here I lie, food for worms" TJ), the one who has an adult child with bipolar and told me my writing moves and helps her and that because of my blog she asks new questions during her Sunday School class, the one who told me about the Chopra book she's reading right now, the one who shared with me her thoughts on the everlasting soul and guardian angels, the one who asked questions about my prophecies and just listened when I needed her, the one who tells me he will protect me as long as he lives.....
Thank you for your kindness and love,
your interest and attention,
the insights you offer,
the perspectives you share,
the links you send me,
the caring interactions,
the thoughtful conversations,
Above all, your belief in me.
You all inspire and uplift me. You make me know my writing is worthy and serves a purpose. You're helping me do what I am supposed to do on this earth. Keep reaching out to me, keep talking to me, keep reading.
The next thing I want to talk about is what to do with the people in your life that make you feel miserable. There are people out there in our paths that are filled with self-loathing and anger and fear. They do not multiply the love in our own hearts, they attempt to strangle and suffocate it. They cower in the face of our own strength and confidence. It's as if light and love blind and frighten them. They do not want to believe people can be happy and peaceful and content with self-love. This is because they themselves are bereft of that self-love... And that's because long ago, at some very early age, their own love was rebuffed. Their own love went unrequited. They gave love to someone special and found only an empty heart. They spoke love and only heard echoes in return. Like the Grinch, this rebuff shrunk their heart by three times and they went into defense mode and now they judge and question love when they see it themselves. They lash out when that's the last thing they want to do. It's a reflex, an age old response. It's a vicious cycle.
Here's how you stop it. Decide that you will not be a victim or target of the slings they throw....that their hard edges will not make you brittle. Lavish love and praise and confidence on yourself and tell yourself daily "I am good, I am loving, my own heart knows truth." Line your own nest with kindness and nurture your own good instincts. Because those instincts are dead on and will not be obscured by others' pain or fear. When I can pity them for their own crushed hearts it's easier to parry their jabs and not rise to the fight. I can let it go and eventually, in time and on my own time, turn love back on them without fear of rejection.
Your purpose also is to protect the young from small and starving hearts. Praise your kids and answer their own calls for love... this will strengthen them in the face of unrequited love.
Know that you cannot save or cure those in your life that make you feel miserable. That is not your job and it will be an unending and unrewarding quest. Just cherish yourself. That's all you can do today.
Finally, you know I don't pray. But if any of you out there do pray, can I ask you a favor? Can you pray that I can get some sleep. This waking up to pee because I am pregnant and not being able to go back to sleep can be hell on a girl.
Have a great Monday and a very happy May! Love
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